
Category: Writing
-
-
-
The good thing about Indian dance shows
The last bell to the Government school opposite to our office rings. Children come rushing out. A group of around 15 boys are gathered near our building gate. We are curious to see what they are doing. One of the boys tells everyone to give him some space and does a reverse somersault three times. Looking at him, another comes out of the group and does a headstand. Few more boys follow; a lot more dance moves come out. Gradually, there is a healthy B-boying battle going on between the boys. The group disperses after a few stunts leaving me thinking. These boys are not more than 10-12 years old. Unlike mine, they come from a not-so-comfortable background. Some of them don’t even have shoes on. But when they did those moves, I was pleasantly surprised by their attitude and the smoothness with which they moved. It was a healthy competition, each observing and trying to learn from the other. And they have learnt all this by just watching the various dance shows that air on television. The good thing is these boys have found out so early in their lives about what they love to do. Hope they never lose it and shock the world with their moves.
-
On the road to inner peace

Master Shifu! Forget Po, you should go to Bandra West if you want to see the perfect example of Inner Peace being practised. Once you reach near Kensilworth Arcade which is opposite McDonalds and houses KFC on the ground floor, just stop at the bend outside KFC. People who know this area well will tell you that Chaos is its middle name. Noise, Traffic and Confusion have been residing there since years. There at the same KFC corner, a few feet apart from each other, you will see two souls all curled up with their eyes closed, immersed in a world of their own. People would be hurrying past them; vendors would be shouting at the top of their voices and also in their ears; cabs and rickshaws would not be making things any easier. But they won’t budge, not even an inch. Their eyes will remain closed; their bodies will still be curled up; and you would be rubbing your eyes and pinching yourself to check if all of this is real. And no, they are not dead. You would know when you watch the easy, controlled breathing through the ups and downs of their stomachs. Life’s a bitch, they say but these two dogs (huge ones at that) sure know how to take it in their stride. Po could learn something from them. I know I did. Thank you, Dogs. Woof!
-
Conversation with a cabbie
I was stuck in evening traffic on my way to KFC, Bandra in a cab when the cabbie started a conversation with an interesting and amusing thought.
Cabbie: Goverment ko family planning chod kar ab car planning shuru kar dena chahiye. Kitne car hain road par.
Me: (smiling) Hmmm.
Cabbie: Aapko yehi utarna hain ki aur aagey jaana hain?
Me: Aur aagey. McDonalds pata hain aapko? KFC ki yaahan.
Cabbie: Yeh KFC ka full form kya hain?
Me: Kentucky Fried Chicken. Kentucky America mein hain. Ek aadmi ne fried chicken banaya aur woh famous ho gaya. To usne yeh shuru kar diya. Kyunki Kentucky Fried Chicken itna lamba naam hain, to usne…
Cabbie: Use KFC kar diya (laughs).
Me: Haan. Wahan ka Vada Pav hain samjh lo.
Cabbie: Mujhe goverment ne Special Magistrate ka post diya hain. Pata hain aapko. Woh True Copy karke sign aur stamp karte hain na, woh. Doctors, lawyers ko banate hain…Gazetted Officer. Government ne mujhe bhi banaya hain.
Me: Attestation ke liye…hmmm. To aap taxi kyun chalate hain?
Cabbie: Yeh to hamara purana kaam hain. Ise kaise chod sakte hain. Maine ek card bhi banaya tha. Mere naam ke baad maine likh diya ‘Taxi Driver’. Mere dost ne kahan ki Taxi Driver kyun chapva diya. Maine kahan ki to us mein kya hain. Baad mein maine use short karke TD kar diya.
Me: (laughing) Yeh accha kiya. Log poochenge ki TD kya hain.
Cabbie: (smiling) Haan. Jaise Bcom, BA hota hain waise TD. Woh aa gaya KFC.
Me: Wohi left mein ruka dijiye. Kitna hua? (giving money) Apke paas aapka card hoga ab?
Cabbie: (taking the money) Nahi. Aap number le lo.
Me: Aap ka naam kya hain?
Cabbie: Gyan Singh. Number hain 99XXX XXXXX
Me: Attestation kahan se karte ho? Rehte kahan ho?
Cabbie: Malad.
Me: Aap pure din taxi chalate ho to attestation kaise aur kab karte ho?
Cabbie: Ab thodi der mein ghar jaakar shuru karunga. Line lag jaati hain raat ko. Nahi to logon ko keh deta hoon ki ghar ka pata de do, subeh subeh mein hi aa jaunga. Area ki ladke kehte hain ki aap bhi. (smiles)
Me: Accha hain. Chaliye. Khyal rakhiyega aap ka.
Cabbie: Thank you. Aapka shubh naam kya hain?
Me: Karthik.
Cabbie: Woh Ganesh ke bete hain na.
Me: Nahi. Bhai hain.
Cabbie: Accha, accha. Chaliye.
I walked away smiling towards my destination. I particularly loved our farewell where he wrongly assumed Lord Karthik to be Ganesh’s son. Thank you, Mr. Gyan Singh, for the useful gyan. 🙂
-
Short and sweet conversation
While I was walking down the steps of Mahim station towards the platform, a Gujarati grandfather and his 3, maybe 4-year old granddaughter are walking up the stairs. Grandpa has her school bag and water bottle in one hand and the other one is holding her tiny hand. Here is the sweet conversation that followed.
Granddaughter: Bag aapo ne. (Give me the bag)
Grandpa: Nai. (No)
Granddaughter: Bag saaf che? (Is the bag clean?)
Grandpa: Haan. (Yes)
Granddaughter: To bag aapo ne mane. (Then give the bag to me.)
Grandpa: Nai. (No)
Granddaughter: Bag bhari che? (Is the bag heavy?)
Grandpa: Haan. (Yes)
Granddaughter: Reva dyo. (Then let it be.)
And she silently walked up with her grandpa and I walked down, shaking my head, with a big smile on my face.
-
Work hard. Study harder.
On Saturday, I was having a very late lunch at this place called Shri Krishna, a small eating joint in one of the bylanes of Mahim. It serves, mostly delivers, gharguti jevan (food that tastes like it’s been made at home). All the staff, mostly young guys and girls, had finished working for the first shift and were tidying up and having their lunch. While I was relishing my Chana Masala and Chapattis, I heard two of them, a girl and a boy, talking. She asked him about his admissions to which he replied something and then later started talking about his exam schedule. He talked further about his lectures he has in the coming week. She asked him whether he had opted for Science or the Arts stream to which he replied that he had opted for Commerce. That’s when it hit me. It was such a contrasting situation. On one hand, the work that they were doing at that very moment was cleaning the leftovers, washing the utensils, arranging the cleant ones, and the conversation that they were having—that too a passionate one—was about studies. They seemed to have no qualms about working and the kind of work that they were doing given the fact that at this age, they should be just studying. Maybe, they knew that they need to work in order to survive and study, in order to grow. In my mind, studies or not, they had already grown up. Kudos to them for doing what they are doing and here’s hoping that they reach where they aspire to reach.
-
Partnership

Partnership mein 90% trust to hona hi chahiye. 10% dhoka chalega.
—Owner, Guru Da Dhaba
In a partnership, you need 90% trust. Then, we can make do with 10% of cheating. This wise and practical thought on business partnership came from a soft-spoken Punjabi man who runs a small hotel called ‘Guru Da Dhaba’ in Lokhandwala, Andheri (W), Mumbai. While we were waiting for getting the money back after paying the bill, we shared how we really liked the lip-smacking, tastes-like-home-cooked-food Punjabi fare and asked him why he didn’t he open branches in other parts of the city. The man replied that he and his wife manage this place; children work at big companies and don’t want to sit and run a hotel; and he can start branches if only he could find someone trustworthy to run a place like this. During this piece of conversation, he dropped this gem of a thought. I later realised I never asked his name. There’s always a next time, I guess. Thank you, Sardarji owner of Guru Da Dhaba for the food and sharing your wisdom.
-
Inspire it forward

A while back, I had stumbled upon Good Fucking Design Advice which, well, gave good fucking design advice and then some. I happened to visit the site again to download another wallpaper and I noticed this small line at the bottom after the Copyright stuff which said, “Inspired by this and this.” Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it didn’t bother me. I went ahead and clicked on ‘this’. And the other ‘this’ too. The first one led me to a website called ‘What The Fuck Is My Social Media Strategy‘, made by two other guys which takes a dig at corporate jargon about Social Media Strategy (duh?). I enjoyed the dig and I noticed something at the bottom. Guess what? A line that says, “Inspired by this.” I clicked on that too. I mean ‘this’. Meanwhile, the second this from the first website called for my attention. I checked it. I landed up on ‘What The Fuck Should I Make For Dinner‘. This site shouts out random dinner suggestions which you can keep on rejecting if you like (don’t try it with your wife, though). Remember the first ‘this’ on the second website. Yes! That one led me to this same dinner website. I couldn’t help it. I checked the bottom of the site. There was a ‘this’. But it was not a clue. It was a part of a sentence that said, “This site was fucking made by Zach”. “To hell with the cat”, I said and clicked on Zach and it led me to a website of Zach Golden, a copywriter in NYC, who, by the way, didn’t have ‘Fucking’ anywhere on the site. So, all in all, a nice fucking search from one fucking interesting website led me to another and then another and then yet another one which further led me to one fucking cool guy who fucking started it all. Fucking copying, you might say. Well, I think it is fucking inspiring. Maybe, I will start a fucking website. Be sure to check the bottom that will say, “Inspired by this, this and this. Or maybe that. Whatever. If you are still fucking reading this, don’t! Go and surf these fucking awesome sites instead. Thank you fucking Zach for starting it all.
